So, wow, quite a break I've taken from giving an update...sorry! Not the first time and unfortunately probably not the last time, ha. I really didn't intend for this much time to get by...
We've been to Boston and back twice now. Selah had a thumb reconstruction on her same hand, the left hand. The doctor's goal was to reposition the thumb to try to get it into a more favorable position...in hopes that she'll be able to use it more appropriately for fine motor and daily tasks. We went back to Boston to get her cast off and to get fitted for her splint. She's out of both now...except for the splint at night time. We've been doing her OT(Occupational Therapy) locally. In about a week or so, we are to email some video and pictures of her thumb to our Boston doc so he can let us know his recommendations. If he is pleased with her progress then we'll just take a break until the Spring, when we pursue starting the other hand surgery. If he sees that something needs to be worked on though, then we'll be making a trip back up there this fall. So, we'll see.
She is trying to use her thumb. Like last time though, it lacks strength and the ability to really oppose. It's "norm" position is still to hyperextend(practically bend backwards) which isn't ideal. It's hard for me not to wish it were doing better or had turned out differently this time around, but I try to be thankful for what she is trying to do with it. I just long for her to be able to button or zip or use scissors or just other activities that are by no means critical but just part of daily life. She doesn't give up trying and she adapts and uses her feet and other creative ways to try to do what she intends to do!
She's started back to her group therapy twice a week and has a new teacher and new friends. So far that has gone well. She'll also go to a regular preschool class just one time a week. It is in the same program she attended last year but she will have a new teacher. Thankfully the teacher is a friend from church so that makes Selah and I feel good! She is now to where she just jumps right in and it's more me that is hovering around analyzing the situation, lol...but very true.
She's been pretty healthy lately. She's scheduled to have some MRI and CT scans of her head, neck, and vertebrae done before too long. The scans are to just give an updated picture of what's going on with her and how everything is looking. There have still been no decisions or moving forward with jaw surgeries right now. For the time being we're trying to get the hand surgeries taken care of.
On another note, I was reading her devotional with her one night and the story was brief and written so simply but God spoke clearly to me. I've been struggling lately or for a long while now, with letting go and just being content with where we're at and just with how things are. It hurts so much sometime to think about what may or may not lie ahead for Selah and the fact that I can't fix it or don't have the answers. This story though, was about Mary and when the angel of the Lord came to her to tell her she would become pregnant with Jesus. Just as Mary was to begin an unexpected and uncertain journey with this baby to be, I remembered beginning one of hope and yet wonder of what will be with our sweet baby girl. A journey of venturing away from well planned dreams and expectations of how it would all play out into a journey of complete and supernatural surrender...nothing of you, only what the power of the Holy Spirit in you enables. And so as I then read of Mary's journey into motherhood and watching Jesus grow, I again felt my heart pricked as I totally identified with her for another moment. Here she now has this child she now dearly loves, yet has to remember to let go of, because ultimately he doesn't belong to her. She tries to love and nurture her Jesus as she knows that the future won't be easy and is filled with uncertainty. But despite not knowing what all the future held in any of her journey with Jesus, Mary held to her faith and the fact that she believed God and that was enough. So, as I read of Mary and her courage, it has been my heart's cry as well...to be a woman of genuine faith and belief...willing to say "ok God, let it be as you have said..."
Luke 1:37-38 "For nothing is impossible with God. I am the Lord's servant, Mary answered, May it be to me as you have said."
